Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Due to the knowledge I have attained from further procrastination in the form of watching The West Wing, I would like to rescind my previous statement that I prefer Will Bailey to Sam Seaborn. How could I have been so blind?

Also, donate to my movie! Its going to be amazing!
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Don't Watch That...

In the spirit of diet advice from girly magazines worldwide -- "Don't eat chips; Rice cakes are a much healthier option. And low calorie!" (Thank you, Cosmo Geniuses) I am going to give you similar cinematic advice that, to many, may seem equally obvious.

Don't watch New Years Eve. 200 Cigarettes is a much better option. And won't cost you $11.50!

As you probably know, New Year's Eve is the most recent "Oh my God, everyone is in this movie" movie, it's predecessors being Love Actually and Valentine's Day and it's successor being Arbor Day starring Jessica Biel, Will Smith, Amanda Seyfried, 50 Cent, Daniel Radcliffe, Eva Mendes, Andrew Garfield, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Dakota Fanning, Justin Bieber, Tracy Morgan, and Al Pacino.

I know that my text is saturated with sarcasm, but I do actually like these mega-ensemble flicks. In fact, Love Actually is one of my favorites. Year after year, I hope that Christmas will bring me my true love, but all I am left with the only parallel being that, like Laura Linney's character, I too will probably never sleep with Rodrigo Santoro. Anyway, I fear that that cyclical, bandwagon- jumping Hollywood may be turning audiences off to the greatness that can be quirky ensembles. Because, actually, ensembles should be just that -- quirky, as they should mix together all the different personalities and personae of their cast members, rather that having fifteen famous people play basically the same person. This, I believe, is what New Years Eve does. So, I would like to divert your attention to the truly funny, romantic, quirky ensemble 200 Cigarettes.

"Same Night. Same Party. Love at Full Blast"

200 Cigarettes, like New Years Eve, is set in the New York City on the eve of the new year, and features a staggering amount of famous faces: Courtney Love, Paul Rudd, Martha Plimpton, Ben Affleck, Casey Affleck, Jay Mohr, Kate Hudson, Christina Ricci, Gaby Hoffman, Dave Chappelle, Janeane Garofalo, and Elvis Costello. It depicts the shenanigans that a host of New Yorkers and two mouthy teens from Ronkonkoma face as they try to ring in 1982. Rather than revolving around the Times Square-esque New Years, it focuses on Village-ish artsy grunge of the 1980s, and crafts characters that are unique from one another. Further, instead of molding convoluted ways to weave the stories together (A is friends with B, who is sleeping with C, who is married to D, who is E's sister, so obviously they're all in the same movie), 200 Cigarettes keeps the stories separate until the end when all the characters end up at the same party and further connections are made.

It is delightfully quirky and unique. And its not like trading chips for rice cakes, because 200 Cigarettes is neither fluffy nor bland. All you'd be sacrificing is movie theater popcorn. Eat home-popped instead -- heart healthier and low calorie!