Monday, December 12, 2011

Interview with the Godfather: Vampires and Mobsters

Ok, yes, I am procrastinating...again. But, at least this time I am procrastinating in the library, which is inherently better than procrastinating in my bed. Wouldn't you agreed?

Anyway, anyone who knows me at all well knows that I love vampires and all vampire-related things and I find the Mafia and all Mafia-related things fascinating. In terms of explanations for these obsessions, I really don't have one expect that they are both dark and scary, but kind of sexy. Of course, the Mafia is not actually sexy. It is just depicted that way in American media. And I could definitely get into all that at a later time, but not even I can procrastinate that much. I can, however, procrastinate enough to tell you how the Mafia is similar to Twilight. Yes, yes, it can and will be done.


1. Vampires are dangerous. So is the Mafia.

2. Both the Cullens and the Mafia are a family. However, neither is a family that one is born into. The Cullens must be made into vampires and then adopted into the family. In the Mafia, people are made, or make their bones, before they can become a real part of the the family. Once they are in the family, vampires become blood-thirsty killers and, well, kill people. The same goes for new members of the Mafia. Of course, the Cullens are 'vegetarians' and eat only animals. I'm pretty sure 'vegetarian' mafiosi don't exist.

3. Like in Stephanie Myers' breathtaking saga (=/), there exist many different factions of vampires. There are the blonde ones in Alaska and the British ones in Italy and the [spoiler] hybrid mutant ones in the Amazon and oodles more that the Cullens are not closely acquainted with. Similarly, the Mafia has lots of different families -- the Gambinos and the Bonannos and the Lucchese and oodles more in cities all over the US and abroad.


4. The Mafia follows an honor code which includes Omerta, or the vow of silence. They are not supposed disclose the business of the family to anyone outside of the family. Likewise, the Cullens must move every decade or so to keep their identity secret from the human world around them.

5. Finally, the Cullens are to werewolves as the Mafia is to the modern American Witness Protection Program. Hear me out; I thought of this one when I was watching In Plain Sight. In Twilight, werewolves are not always werewolves. Many moons ago, the vampires came to the area in which Jacob's ancestors were living. Because the vampires came and posed a threat to the humans, the Native Americans magically became werewolves to answer the call and protect people. Many times, this means hunting down and killing the vampires. The protective werewolves came into existence because of the proximity of vampires. Similarly, in the 70s, the FBI wanted to hunt down and imprison all the mafiosi. To do so, they needed witnesses, and WITSEC had to come into existence. The purpose, obviously was to protect people willing to breach Omerta and roll on family members. That is, the protective WITSEC came into existence because of the indictment of the Mafia, because, for witnesses, any proximity with mafiosi is a bad thing.

So there you have it, and explanation of the Mafia through the lens of Twilight, so that 12-year- old girls everywhere may gain a better understand of a major international crime syndicate. I should probably do my work now and try not to daydream about a Vampire-Mafia movie.

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